Tips to Keep Your Girl Age Appropriate
At our multicultural girls camp, we are very intentional and mindful of doing activities that empower our young ladies, giving them the tools to be stronger in the outside world. Sadly, however, in that “outside world” there is increasing pressure seemingly everywhere for girls and young women to look older, sexier, and more mature than they are. Children’s cartoons have female characters wearing skimpy clothes; shows that are popular with teens and pre-teens, like Glee and America’s Next Top Model feature “kids” twice their age. Retailers directed at teens and pre-teens sell clothes with plunging necklines and super-short skirts-even slinky underwear and bathing suits with padded chests! Frighteningly, the (external) beauty product industry has annual sales of upwards of $500 million from girls aged 8 to 12 years old!
Unattainable standards hurt self-esteem
Beginning about 50 years ago, the impossible “Barbie” model set an unreachable standard for girls and young women. Today, with provocatively dressed “Bratz” dolls in the marketplace, and commercials in every media bombarding young women, girls continue to get the message that women are valued for their looks instead of their intelligence, humor, kindness, talent, or athleticism. Psychologists point out that when the average young girl looks in the mirror and doesn’t see a perfect image like those that are regularly Photoshopped in popular magazines staring back, she starts feeling bad about her own body, which can lead to anxiety and depression.
So, until you can get your daughter to the empowering environment of Camp Kupugani, here are some tips on how to keep your daughter confident and age-appropriate (originally printed in Family Circle magazine):
Turn off the TV more often at home!
If/when your daughter does watch TV, watch with her whenever possible. That way, you can discuss ridiculous or unrealistic scenarios. For example, if you’re watching The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, you can ask, “Don’t you wonder how London gets her homework done when she spends so much time in front of the mirror?”
Introduce your daughter to women she can admire for their accomplishments.
You can start by attending a community musical or a women’s basketball game.
Mix up her peer group.
In other words, sign her up for activities that aren’t school-based, like karate, gymnastics, or pottery class. She’ll feel less pressure to follow the crowd if she spends time with other kids, and is exposed to other ideas and other ways of doing things.
Numerous studies show how campers learn new skills, and gain confidence and self-esteem. You can promote that same sense of accomplishment at home. When girls are proud of their accomplishments, they’ll be a lot less concerned about hair, clothes, and makeup.
What ideas do you have that can help girls combat negative media influence? Please share in the comments below!
For more on what girls can do, check out this link on how a teenage girl takes on Seventeen Magazine regarding negative images.